What you don’t know about me (or maybe you do??? Hehe)

Morning lovelies,

I have no idea why I decided to do this post, there’s no reason for it & no meaning behind it, the idea just popped into my head! I don’t very often get ideas just pop in my head & I’ve had so many in the past that I’ve just ignored because I thought they would be to boring & not what people want to read but I’m not worrying about it anymore, I’m just going to post what I want to post & what I’d like to read, I’m incredibly nosy, so I love personal posts from bloggers. Hehe.

Things you may not know about me

I’m a typical Taurus & like a bull in a china shop.

I love mother earth.

I don’t understand why people get so worked up about faith & why people can’t just let people believe what they want to, why are some people so determined to deprive people of a little bit of happiness? I sometimes think there’s a little pagan inside me screaming to get out but then wonder if god is actually real, here’s the thing, I struggle to believe in god because of the following – I think it’s incredibly arrogant to think that one being alone created the earth as we know it, I’m more inclined to think that it was numerous beings each doing their bit. Also, christianity isn’t the oldest faith, paganism is older but the only proof we have of either is, here say, what people believe & books. If you believe something has power, it will have power over you. I do believe that everyone should have some kind of belief system & me, well, I haven’t found one I’m 100% comfortable with. I say all this & yet in my sitting room, you’ll find 3 bibles that are Richards & about 15 books on paganism that belong to me. Make of that what you will. I suppose if you need to see something in order to believe in it then it can hardly be called a belief system???

I can’t be quiet to save my life, I’ve got a big gob & trust me, you’ll know when I’m looking for something cause it’ll sound like there’s a hurricane in the room, the silly thing is, the quieter I try to be, the louder I get. Hehe.

On occasion, I open my mouth before my brain engages & end up feeling guilty because of it, especially when I say stuff I don’t mean, usually when I’m cross or annoyed, guilt is my most crushing emotion, sometimes I feel like it’s knocked the wind right out of me! It also happens when I’m pissed off & I tend to say stuff under my breath & that’s been heard on occasion (naughty).

I love history, although, at school, I don’t actually remember liking any subject, I remember liking some teachers more than others but not subjects, I did do better in some subjects than others. History fascinates me so much, I think it’s amazing to think that people have walked where I’ve walked centuries before me, I mean, that is just mind-blowing.

This may be intense but I would risk my life to save those I love but ask for a bite of what I’m eating & although, I may smile slightly & offer you a piece, I’m secretly wanting to cut out your tongue for daring to ask me, when it comes to food, I’m the most selfish person you’ll ever meet! I saved Richard 2 little free from chocolate logs but as I’m writing this, I’m eating them. Hehe.

I can be incredibly mardy & like to get my own way, although, I can put a face on for most occasions & only those who know me best would know. Hehe.

I’m not the most patient of people, I want everything yesterday, I hate having to wait around for people or things & it’s even worse when I’ve got to rely on that/them before I can do something.

I think one of my worst things is that I struggle to forgive easily & I truly wish I could because it can be crushing when you really want to forgive someone but you just can’t, especially when it’s someone you love, I have learnt that it does get easier with time.

One thing I hate in life is looking stupid, some people can just laugh it off but I REALLY hate it & can’t forgive people who do it deliberately & back stabbers, I wish I could.

I can be found messing around on occasion & being silly, I don’t do serious most of the time & enjoy a good laugh, I couldn’t stand to spend most of my days with people who aren’t prepared to have a giggle on occasion & are opposed to some silliness!

On 1st impression some will think I’m stand offish & on the odd occasion, I’ve thought of myself as being down right rude & trust me, on those occasions, I’ve given myself a jolly good telling off, my parents didn’t raise a rude, ignorant, un-thoughtful person! You may think I’m not a very approachable person on 1st meeting me, I’ve tried over the years to break this but although I’m a lot better than I was years ago, I’ve still not broken the habit of coming across that way, I wish I could be my best self at all times but I just can’t do it, some days I’m full of beans & the whole world is full of rainbows, fluffy clouds, princes & princesses but on the other days, they are full of rain clouds, bloody orcs & the world can go stuff itself!

Those who take the time to get to know me, know that your 1st impression of me is not always the one you’ll be left with, some people say your 1st impression of people is the correct one, well, let you be the one to inform you that, that is an incorrect evaluation, I too used to think that way & it’s only through getting to know myself better that I’ve realised that 1st impressions don’t always count & never to judge a book by its cover!

I’m incredibly selfish with my time, I could quite happily just sit & watch movie marathons for days on end (usually Harry Potter or Twilight) & be quite content to choose to do that over going pub or around town! Some people may think I’m boring & quite frankly, I don’t care if they do, I know what I like. If however, I’m offered a night of dancing or a good film at the cinema, that’s a different matter, me & Richard have just signed up for the unlimited card at our local cineworld & I’ve already booked us lots of upcoming films, I can’t wait.

My favourite season is Autumn with Winter a very close 2nd, I love the last 4 months & the 1st month of the year.

I get giddy about christmas & I surprise myself by being secretly glad I don’t have children because that shit would cost us a fortune & I don’t think my parents would appreciate me turning their home into santas frickin grotto in the middle of a winter wonderland! Hehe. Come to think of it, if we had kids, halloween would cost us fortune too because I’d want to turn our house into a haunted mansion! I have no restraint now, so goodness knows what I’d be like if we had children. Hehe. Everything happens for a reason.

I used to think I was quite shy & although, I don’t do public speaking very well & blush at the easiest of public speaking conversations, I actually realised that I’m not at all shy & I love being the person people go to for whatever the need may be & I’m actually quite a forward person, although I don’t love being the centre of attention, I do expect to be given the recognition I’ve earned & love to get the attention an occasion may call for (i.e. birthday, wedding, something I’ve organised etc).

I find myself being bothered about what people think of me & feel a little hurt when I find out someone doesn’t like me without justification.

I can’t stand back stabbers, if you’ve got something to say, then bloody say it, I try very hard not to jump on someones bitching wagon & 99% of the time, I won’t & when you think I’m on it with you, you may notice that I’m actually not saying a lot.

You won’t hear a lie come out of my mouth (99% of the time, I’m not perfect you know), I’ve got myself into trouble a few times cause I refuse to lie & if you needed me to lie for you, it had better be life or death. I also will not deliberately name people to get them into trouble, if I’m name dropping to you, then I’m ranting, I trust you & don’t expect it to be repeated, I would never give a name to someone I didn’t trust when I’m having a rant, the only time I will is when I’m spreading praise but I also refuse to let people think I’ve done something wrong or made a mistake when I haven’t, if it’s my fault, don’t worry, you’ll know but if it’s not, I’ll say so but you wouldn’t get the culprits name from my lips unless I slip up & blurt it out mid rant about being blamed (I’ve done that before & the guilt is horrifying).

I feel deeply other peoples pain & suffering, I can’t bare to watch the news or read the papers, there’s never anything worth celebrating nowadays, I’m extremely sensitive to peoples feelings & emotions & can pick up on things easily. The words ‘I’m fine’ cover a multitude of sins. I’m an incredible listener & the strongest secret keeper you’ll ever find. You could tell me your troubles & I’d listen without opinion or judgement & you could cry on my shoulder whilst I held you up & in that moment, I’m 100% yours unconditionally. I feel hurt & sadness easily, I can’t bare it when I hear of the elderly or animals being hurt (for whatever reason) & when it’s human inflicted, I find myself full of hate, I just want to scream & smash the TV screen into a million pieces or rip the newspaper into shreds! I’ve been reduced to tears at work before now because of something I read in the newspaper.

I would not want to look at your face or see your revolting black heart, if you lie about me, blame me for something I’ve not done, deliberately make me look stupid or hurt anyone I care about in any way. I’m a strong believer in Karma & you WILL get what you deserve!

My 1st reaction is very rarely my real reaction, like I said before, I react before my brain engages, the amount of times I’ve been asked to do something & moaned about it or just sighed (I’m good at that), just to end up doing it anyway! That’s one of the reasons people find me unapproachable but when they know me better, they know how my brain works! Hehe.

I struggle with starting something if I know I’m not going to be able to give it my all, I’m not a perfectionist but I struggle to see the point in doing a job if you’re not going to or can’t (for whatever reason) do it well.

I suffer from a little OCD with silly things like checking locked doors, I mean, not once but like 3 odd times.

I’m sick of being fat but don’t know what to do about it!!! When it comes to food, I’ve got the will power of someone after a bottle of JD honey! Hehe.

My favourite thing in life is love, laughter, happiness & togetherness, I love seeing & feeling love & happiness.

My favourite style of film is fantasy (Harry Potter, Twilight & the like). I love films that take me away from the mundane crap of life.

This is my ideal style – Fashion & Accessories I Love

I hope you have an amazing week.

Bye for now.


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